A mom

Being a mom is about the hardest and the most rewarding job anyone can ever have. I do not wear a power suit or carry a briefcase. I do not adorn heels or put nylons on everyday. In fact I am lucky to wash the soap out of my hair before someone is calling my name. Or eat a meal sitting down. It isn't until I hold my baby or laugh at a joke my growing daughter makes that I step outside myself and realize how blessed I am.

I used to take a hot bath with candles and bubbles. Now I bathe with two little ones first and pray that the water heater still is producing warm water. I used to smell like a woman and now I smell of crayons, baby spit up and elementary schools. The thing is that I could not be happier. I laughed the other day remembering when I was simply "Holly". Now I am a grunt called out from Ethan, Mommy or Hannahs mom.

It is amazing to me how quickly time flies by. I can remember when I first held Hannah and would have never imagined that I would be holding another. I remember when she started to walk and now she is starting her journey in school and finding herself. I think all of the time how I will explain to her the importance of finding herself. The truthfulness inside of her heart. Not what others think she should be. How will I teach her the importance of accepting her own body no matter what flaws it has? No matter what society labels as beautiful when it was not until I hit my early 20's that I looked in the mirror and thought "This is me and I like that". How will I handle her first heartbreak? When Ethan falls in love with a woman that clearly is not what he needs. How will I handle the breaking of curfews and smartmouths? When "I hate you mom" outweighs the conversation far more then "I love you"?

Thinking about it really makes me pull my own my closer then I ever thought I would. Will I become Hannah's best friend the way my mom is mine? Will my teachings be enough? My teachings of family values and the importance of sticking together really get through to them?

There is nothing like the smile of a child. The cuddle when you need it. The little hand that pats your back when you have the roughest day known to man. There is nothing like a kiss goodbye in the morning before school or a wam little body next to yours in the middle of the night. Knowing that there is always someone there. Someone is always thinking of you and needing you. I know someday they won't need me as much, but I will always be there.
Loving them
Accepting them
Needing them.

They are a part of me.